The Dead Don’t Die Was a Bland Zombie Movie

It’s Halloween month and this is the second time I’m doing a Halloween Movie Marathon (I should think of a cooler name for this) at my house. This is when I try to watch at least one spooky movie a week in preparation for Halloween.

I found myself at Best Buy one day and saw the Blu Ray cover for The Dead Don’t Die and it looked pretty awesome.

I couldn’t help but be intrigued by the cover, the hand coming out of the ground and flesh coming off of it. Then I read the names of the cast members, and I was like “oh, looks like a fun movie.” So I picked it up for a good price.

Let’s fast forward – I put the movie in the Blu Ray player and spent the next hour and 45 minutes trying to figure out why I did this to myself?

The pacing of this movie was super slow, and when I say slow, I mean… slow and agonizing. I’d rather watch golf or go to a baseball game where both teams are at 0-0 in the 8th inning.

Comedy is supposed to make you laugh, at least that’s what I thought. But I found myself laughing at how awful this movie was rather than the horrendous lines told by the actors in an attempt make you laugh. You know there’s a problem with a movie when you’re checking social media rather than actually watching the movie you paid for.

What Else Are We in For?

Jim Jarmusch is known for some pretty weird stuff, but I’m telling you, The Dead Don’t Die was a bland Zombie movie. It had no flavor. It felt so forced, and comedy is not funny when it’s forced. The cast is really talented but it just doesn’t feel right. I’m sure that’s what the director was going for, a far-out, eccentric zombie comedy, and maybe his fans like these types of movies, but I was let down.

The zombies in this movie can talk, they basically want to do things in death that they really enjoyed in life. I guess that’s the best part of the movie, the zombies were pretty nonsensical, pretty silly. However, the footage was sped up in certain shots to make the zombies look more awkward as they moved around, again, another quirky thing to do that was pretty cheesy.

The gore and violence in this movie was pretty typical of zombie movies. Not too crazy where it makes you queasy, but not too little to leave you wanting more. It was fine.

Let’s Leave it Behind

The Dead Don’t Die was a mediocre movie at best, it tries to be funny, but the blandess is too much. The jokes aren’t that funny, the cast members are good, but their characters are not great. I guess Jim Jarmusch was going for a weird zombie comedy, and it is just that. Weird and not funny at all.